March / April 2020
Automotive Business Review
As I write this, I am anxiously watching the JSE index go down inexorably, and seeing my retirement funds rapidly disappearing down the toilet. I cannot even call it a black swan event, as it is far worse than that and more like an existential crisis.
The cause of this crazy situation is a tiny single strand of
DNA or RNA enclosed in a protein capsule which is causing
havoc across the globe, and whilst it is extremely bad news
for the hoi polloi, even the billionaires are crying into their foie gras.
Panic and overreaction is now the name of the game, and the
world has literally been turned upside down. Lunacy has taken
over, and the impacts are profound. For example, just this morning I have had three events that I was supposed to attend in the next week, cancelled via a curt email. For sports lovers, the cupboard has also gone bare. But the tentacles of insanity go much further, and interspersed with all the postponements and cancellations are bursts of humour perpetrated by government officials and comedians alike. One particularly funny comment is that it is ironic
that Donald Trump now has to face a crisis originating in China,
and named after a Mexican beer. Another political comedian is
one Oppah Muchinguri-Kashiri, the Zimbabwean minister of
defence and war veterans, who in trying to outdo the political
geniuses south of the Limpopo, gave her opinion that the virus
was unleashed by God to punish the West for imposing sanctions on the political elite of Zimbabwe. Maybe Trump can make her
minister of de wall.
But in all seriousness, the world has gone nuts, from Australians
assaulting each other to get that last roll of toilet paper at the
supermarket, to con artists using the crisis to gain entry into
residences under the guise of corona virus testing. And even I amnot immune, as I have gone paranoid and have been wonderingwhether I am the prime carrier of the virus, based on the fact that just days after my visit to China in December, the first case of coronavirus was reported in Wuhan; and then just days after my visit to Germany in February, the virus went wild in Europe.
But I reserve my harshest opprobrium for the satanic cult better known as financial advisers, who continue to charge management fees for their financial “skills” even when your portfolio is going down the toilet. These “gurus” always tell you that you must not look at your investment in the short term, but rather the long term,but go very quiet when your hard earned money goes downhillafter ten years, and they simply have no answers. Of course, there
is a management fee for no answers.